


"Not my kinda thing"

by HoransPayne



Series: NiamNetwork Themes [1]
Category: One Direction (Band)
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-08-14
Updated: 2016-08-14
Packaged: 2018-08-08 17:34:28
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,268
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7766995
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/HoransPayne/pseuds/HoransPayne
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>“Do you not wonder what it’d be like to have someone always there for you? Someone you can do everything with? Someone you can share every moment of your life with, good or bad? Someone that’s always there for you whenever you get home?” I was watching him now, wanting to see his reaction, but he just shrugged again and turned his gaze to meet mine.</p><p>“I’ve got you for that though, haven’t I?” A playful smirk appeared on his face as he chuckled slightly.</p>
            </blockquote>





	"Not my kinda thing"

Niall let out a long, drawn out sigh as he plonked himself down on the couch. 

“What’s up with you?” I turned to look at him, and saw him running his hand through his artificially blonde hair, whilst the other lay in his lap.

“Nothing, nothing.” He turned to meet my gaze and smirked. “Just tired is all.” I cringed internally. Niall had been my roommate for two years now, and my best friend for around five years. We met at university through our flatmates. Harry, Niall’s old flatmate, and Louis, my old flatmate, were in the same drama class, and so the two became good friends, and eventually ended up introducing Niall and me to each other. Ultimately, after graduating university, Harry and Louis became roommates, and Niall and I did the same. Being his roommate meant I knew pretty much everything he got up to, during the day, and even worse, at night; the walls weren’t very thick separating our two bedrooms. Niall also had a tendency to bring some, let’s say, vocal people back to our flat. 

“I wonder why that might be.” He simply laughed at my sarcastic reply and roll of the eyes. A quick look to his watch had him almost leaping from his seated position however, remembering that he’d agreed to meet up with Harry for something. He rushed out the door moments later, leaving me on my own in the flat.

Our flat wasn’t very spacious; it was just our two bedrooms, one bathroom and then the living area and kitchen area were combined as one room. I was currently sat on our old, lumpy couch we’d bought second-hand online, which lay opposite to our television, which was currently switched off. I wasn’t much in the mood to do anything more than mope, and feel a bit sorry for myself. See, the thing is, about two seconds after being introduced to Niall I’d fallen hopelessly, head-over-heels in love with the boy. Yeah, yeah, I know, so cliché. I didn’t think “love at first sight” was a real thing either, but the moment my eyes met his I got chills. It was like I’d been fully submerged into the freezing pools that were his eyes. At the time I had no clue what Niall was like, so I was quite happy having that little crush on him. The playful flirting we shared meant our friendship established pretty quickly. I soon learned, however, that Niall is the type of person one might refer to as a “player”. He was openly bisexual, so wasn’t fussy with whom he slept around with, as long as there was someone. 

***

“I still can’t believe you’ve never kissed anyone.”

“Well, believe it, Li!” This was the most shocking thing to me, something I really couldn’t fathom. Niall had never ever kissed anyone. He must’ve slept with, like, a hundred people, and not kissed a single one.

“And you’ve never been on a date either, right?”

“That’s right, Li.” My mouth was hanging open. I already knew this, he’d told me years ago, but I just couldn’t wrap my head around it.

“But, why Niall?” He shrugged his shoulders at me casually and sank lower onto the couch.

“Not my kinda thing.” That was the answer he always gave and I’d come to expect from him. Ever since he’d told me, I was desperate to be the person he deemed special enough to have his first kiss with, and to go on his first date with.

“Niall, you’re twenty-three years old!” He threw one of the cushions on the couch at me for that comment.

“Shut up, Li.” That earned him a smack in the head with the same cushion he’d thrown at me, and resulted in a mini pillow fight on the couch, until Niall fell off and lay on the floor laughing breathlessly.

***

God, he was beautiful. The moonlight reflecting off the blonde parts of his hair made it glow, almost as if he had a halo. If Niall turned out to be an angel fallen from Heaven, I wouldn’t even be surprised. The darker roots of his hair blended with the darkness of the night, and it made me wonder what he’d look like if he stopped dying his hair. Would the dark contrast make his eyes look bluer? In that moment I wasn’t sure that’d be possible, they were blindingly bright. I felt as if I were drowning in the pools of blue each time he looked at me, because I’d almost be gasping for air, unable to form a fathomable sentence. His laugh was like music to my ears, better than any finely tuned harmony I’d ever heard; it was my favourite song. It was so contagious, that’s why I loved to be around him so much. He was happy pretty much all the time; he filled me with so much energy and joy that everything seemed okay when he was around.

He was smiling at me now, that’s what put me in that lovesick daze. I felt like I couldn’t peel my eyes away from his face, as if it would’ve been a crime. The cool air blew around us, but I knew it wasn’t because of that that I had chills. We were both drunk and sitting on the rooftop of our building, gazing over the city skyline. Niall was talking about something, but I wasn’t quite sure what, probably on another one of his rants about how we were going to take over the world together. Sometimes, I felt as if we could. If only he’d let me in.

***

“’Not my kinda thing, not my kinda thing’! Isn’t that just the stupidest thing you’ve ever heard? What the hell does that even mean?” I was feeling pretty low. Niall had brought someone over to the flat and I couldn’t just listen to them all night, so I was now pacing around Louis and Harry’s living room whilst the two were sat on the couch watching me.  
“Liam, come on. Sit down for a minute and take a breather.” Louis was gesturing towards the chair Harry had moved in from their kitchen earlier. I’d been at their flat for a good twenty minutes and I hadn’t stopped pacing since. “You’re gonna wear marks into the floor if you keep that up.” I was too agitated to sit down, but I did for their sake anyway. Instead my leg jiggled up and down distractingly quickly.

“Look, Li. I roomed with the guy for three years at uni.” Harry had moved forward so he was sat on the edge of the couch, with his hands resting on his legs and his face all serious. I would’ve laughed at him in any other situation, really. “He’s been like this since we started. I asked him the same thing you’ve asked him over and over again, and he always replies with-“

“’Not my kinda thing.’” I cut him short. Harry just nodded at me before continuing.

“Exactly. He’s not the type to be tied down to one person. He’s not like you Liam. He likes the freedom that being single brings, whereas you prefer to be someone’s boyfriend. You can’t change him, Liam, as much as it may upset you to hear that, but you really can’t. Maybe someday he’ll change, but it’s something he’s gotta do on his own.” Everything he said made sense, but it didn’t ease the pain. 

***

“Do you never wonder?” He turned his head on his arm so he was facing me.

“What?” We were on the roof again, but this time we were lying down, staring straight up at the sky. The moon seemed even brighter tonight, and the few stars you could see in the sky did their best to outshine it, but with little avail. 

“What it’s like to kiss someone?” He rolled his eyes at me and groaned.

“Not this again, Liam!” He turned his gaze back to the sky, so neither of us were looking at the other now.

“Seriously, Niall! Are you not curious to see what you’re missing out on?” He simply shrugged his shoulders and said nothing, so I leant over and prodded his arm. “Come on, Ni.”  
“Look, Liam. I just don’t really see what there is that I’m missing out on.” 

“Do you not wonder what it’d be like to have someone always there for you? Someone you can do everything with? Someone you can share every moment of your life with, good or bad? Someone that’s always there for you whenever you get home?” I was watching him now, wanting to see his reaction, but he just shrugged again and turned his gaze to meet mine.

“I’ve got you for that though, haven’t I?” A playful smirk appeared on his face as he chuckled slightly. I didn’t want to hold his gaze any longer, out of fear for what he may see if I did, so I turned my head towards the sky again and said nothing. The two of us lay there in silence for a while, the only sound being the buzz of the city below. The sounds of whatever few cars and people were still roaming the streets at this hour of night. My face felt hot, despite the cold breeze billowing around the rooftop; Niall’s watch was burning into me. The incredible heat contradicting the ice cold blue of his eyes. “Li, what’s wrong?” He nudged my arm as he pushed himself to a seated position.  
“Hmm? Nothing.” I sat up as well now. “I’m getting kinda cold, Ni. I think I’m gonna go back inside.” I pushed myself off the ground as Niall grabbed my arm. I didn’t particularly want to meet his eyes, but I did anyway, and the look of concern he wore surprised me.

“Li, did I say something wrong?” The breeze had picked up slightly, and it was blowing his hair so it looked quite dishevelled. All I could think was how soft it looked, and how nice it would feel running through my fingers. “I’m really sorry if I did.” I found myself watching his lips as he spoke. They were so pink and kissable. How he could have lips that soft-looking and not put them to use confused me, just like everything else about Niall confused me. We were both standing now, his hand gripped around my forearm, keeping me in place.

“I’m fine Niall, really. I just wanna go back inside.” His grip on my forearm tightened slightly at my words. The look of concern hadn’t left his face, but there was something else there too. Confusion? His eyebrows were pulled in and his eyes looked like they were searching for something in mine. What would he be confused about, though?  
“Li, I know you don’t understand why I’m the why I am.” He released my forearm from his grip, and instead placed his hand on my shoulder and gave it a gentle squeeze. “It’s just... I never wanted to waste my first kiss on someone that didn’t matter to me. I don’t know; I know it’s weird, but to me a kiss is more special than just screwing someone. I guess I just never found anyone important enough to kiss yet.” The word “yet” echoed around my head. It hurt, it really did. I mean, I knew my feelings were one sided, but it hurt to hear confirmation of it out loud; that he didn’t think I was special or anything. Something about the way he was looking at me made my stomach turn though. He was chewing on his lip, still holding my shoulder; he looked nervous about something.

“It’s fine Ni, you don’t have to explain yourself to me.” Despite me trying, I don’t think I did a very good job of hiding the hurt from my voice, because Niall gripped my shoulder harder at these words. 

“I know, but I want to. You see, Liam, I just don’t really see what I’m missing out on.” The look in his eyes made my heart break. He looked so sad and lost, and the confusion was still evident on his face.

“Niall, you’re missing out on so much. You can’t be intimate with someone if you don’t kiss them. Just fucking someone is so impersonal, but a kiss is so much more than that. It’s special. When you kiss the right person, it can feel amazing, like electricity is coursing through your veins, like fireworks are exploding inside your head, like-“ I was cut off by Niall suddenly crashing his lips into mine. It was messy, but what more can you expect from someone who’s never kissed anyone before? He wrapped his arms around my neck, whilst I snaked mine around his hips as our lips moved in sync. The kiss felt exactly as I’d been describing to Niall; exactly like you read about in those lovey-dovey books. His lips were just as soft as they looked. Niall was the one to pull away, but he kept his forehead pressed to mine and our noses touching.

“Like that?” His voice squeaked a little as he spoke and I cracked up laughing. We moved away slightly as I laughed at him, and he soon joined me.

“Yeah, Ni, exactly like that.” I leaned forward and pecked him on the lips and I could feel his smile as I did so.

“Well, maybe it can become my kinda thing then.” He smiled at me, his grin lighting up his whole face, his blue eyes shining at me.

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you for reading, I really appreciate it! This work was written for the niamnetwork on Tumblr, for our theme of first kiss/first date. Make sure you check us out on there if you've got time where we post all new niam works, because you can never really have enough niam, can you now? Anyway, thanks again for reading, hope you enjoyed! :D
> 
> Also, if you wanna give me a shout personally on Tumblr, you can find me at horanspayne (or come along to the niamnetwork and ask for Jasmine :) ).


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